I did not ever think that a coven would appeal to me. I shied away from Wicca because of the rules of the faith and practice. I wanted to build and create my own way. Yet, when I was invited to join a small online coven, I was excited. The leader was knowledgeable and had brought over members she trusted deeply from a prior group she had created.
I went in with little expectation. I had barely begun my own practice and was eager to learn. But practicing online, with strangers, proves to be a difficult thing over time. As one of the older members, my day to day life made it difficult to connect with them. We had wonderful conversations regarding craftwork and how witchcraft is coming further into the public eye, but we didn’t really practice together.
Now, while I didn’t learn much in the way of developing craftwork, they did help me realize the path I did want to create for myself. I realized that I no longer found myself reaching to the group to share and grow with. Which sparked me to try to overcompensate with them. I did not want to just leave the space without trying. I truly thought that if I tried to drive conversation or pose questions, challenge them more, we would grow closer. But I eventually found myself at odds with the coven leader. Not in any kind of dramatic way, we just didn’t see eye to eye any longer.
I realized that while I enjoyed the intense conversations that a few engaged in with me, it left others feeling like I was overbearing. I was too opinionated. Which now, I could see how they would get that impression. When I get excited and truly engage, I tend to prattle on and on. It’s rare that I feel safe enough to discuss things like that, so when it happens I dive on in.
There came a moment where I realized that we just weren’t a fit for one another any longer.
Leaving people while on your path does not have to be some big dramatic to-do. Sometimes, you just outgrow your friendship or no longer hold the same perspective. There is no need to burn bridges or curse them to the heavens simple because the relationship no longer suits your needs.
I swore I would never work with a coven unless it was with people I deeply connected with. Lo and behold, within the last few months I have found some of my greatest friends that practice. We are all so different on our paths, but that diversity sparks some amazing growth. No one’s path is better or worse, accepting those differences and learning from and with them can inspire a whole new direction for you.
Be open to the relationships and opportunities that present themselves to you. You’ll find your people in time.