Why I Don't Hide My Spirituality

There is a lot of empowerment to be found in spiritual spaces. Learning to love yourself, claim your space, your power, build beautiful lasting relationships focused on lifting you through your darkest moments.
But there is still fear.
Working to better yourself creates an openness in you. Your emotions are heightened, your desire for connection and understanding.  For the people that do not or cannot understand that, it can create a strong and heartbreaking divide.
It can feel like a target.
There is still darkness in our “religiously-free” culture.  Anyone on any path could and SHOULD recognize that.
MMusing - Why I don't hide
I had a family member, someone I had generally looked up to as a kind person, flat out disown me and tell me I was a horrible person for not following a Christian path.  If I had been standing in front of them… well I’m not quite sure the reaction I would have garnered.
I’ll take the potential melt-downs, confrontation, and future disowning if it means I am staying true to where my spirit is called.
If I chose to hide my spirituality, I wouldn’t be speaking my truth. I would be doing myself and others a disservice by assuming they either do not care or would not understand.
Our souls all resonate differently. As long as we are all working on being compassionate, caring, and empathetic to others, why should we be so concerned about what it is called or where we practice?  We are all trying to better ourselves and our understanding of the world around us.
Spirituality and religion should always be a personal choice.  Otherwise, our spirits slowly starve and never find fulfillment.
I hope your path is one filled with love, support and comfort, no matter what it may be.  I hope that your spirit sings when you live in harmony with those pure intentions.
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Maven Musings: Authenticity and Spirituality

Thanks to the gift of the internet, it is easier than ever for people to act as if they’re heavily invested in a certain interest.
While I try to believe that most people truly show all of themselves – it isn’t lost on me that most only try to show the “perfect” parts.  Which is fair, who wants to share their pain with strangers?
The concept of “Authenticity” has been rolling around in my head all week. How do you communicate a soul shifting journey with strangers? Especially when you can barely conceptualize what it happening privately?

The fear and anxiety has been closing in on me.

I am not interesting.
Just stop trying.

What’s the point?

How dare you call yourself a witch.

How. Dare. You.

My anxiety has so many nice things to say.  It’s just lovely.

I’m late this week because of those anxieties.  It has been so long since I was in a situation where I felt unsure.  Its rare that I step outside my comfort zone.
I’m a “throw caution to the wind in situations you can control” kind of woman.  Always down for an adventure as long it doesn’t push the envelope too far. Always say “yes” if you can 100% back out.

I am afraid of people and spaces that I cannot control.

I’ve had a bit of a small-baby awakening this week addressing this exact problem of mine.
MavenMusings - Authenticity and Spirituality
If you follow MM on instagram, you know that this past weekend we shared  a booth with the always awesome Unicorn Collective* at the Denver Pagan Pride Festival.
I was making myself sick over the idea of having to share my writing and plans with complete strangers.  I can barely talk about it with people I know love and support me.

But something happened while we were there.

I didn’t shut up all day.

We met people that practically jumped up and down at the idea of this whole thing.

I overcame my fear and anxiety because I stepped out of my comfort zone. 

What a concept.

But even with that success, fear sat quietly in the back of my mind. It let me have my #bossbabe moment before it came swooping back in.
I still felt like a fake – a victim of “impostor syndrome”.  I truly fear that my path comes off as insincere because I am so new to the craft.  I have never pursued spirituality before – I just knew I wasn’t religious.

I’ve been avoiding writing about the emotional side of my journey.

 I  frequently avoid uncomfortable emotions until they bubble up and take over.

It is a terrible habit.

But there was a moment today (after wallowing in not knowing what to write) where I realized where I feel most in my power.

Thank you Universe for the wake up.


My power is in being a woman taking the reins and finding her way.

It is in fiercely supporting the people I care for and love.

I truly just want people to happy and healthy.

I can only hope that that is the energy that I put out in the universe.


And you can take that at face value or not. Either way, I will still send you love and hope you find the people you resonate with – the people that make you feel on fire, capable of anything and everything.
Spirituality and paganism for me is about rediscovering myself and reclaiming myself.  It’s appreciating every moment and loving myself and falling in love with my husband every day.
So – this is a fair warning to all that I’m going to be sharing some unpleasant thoughts and experiences moving forward.  I need to face and address them if I am going to grow.

Love & light, mavens.


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August Guidance – Moving Forward

I’ve been wallowing a lot little the past few months. Feeling stuck in my career, feeling stuck spiritually, unwilling to discuss or face painful events in a constructive way. Basically – I’ve been doing a lot of bitching lately.
I traded hiking and working out regularly for the couch and Netflix. I stopped taking the dogs out every evening. I haven’t felt a fire for my job in a while, and it’s starting to show. I’m not sure if I just got burned out or if all the wild energy of August threw me off my game. I haven’t felt knocked around in a while – so I didn’t handle it very well.

They finally got sick of my pity party and used my August tarot challenge to give me a swift kick.

August’s message for me can be summed up quite nicely: “Quit wallowing, do something about it, but don’t forget to take care of yourself.”

So, we’re going to take that message into September and focus on it. I love actionable tarot. I don’t enjoy “tell me how X feels” questions – i want things I can control. Things I can focus on to change – to manifest what I need.

September better be ready for some #bossbabe level action. No more playing games – it’s time to rumble.

If you aren’t on IG and would like to see my draws, they are below. Please feel free to comment and let me know your interpretation of them! I’m still learning and love hearing how cards resonate with others.
Aug 2017 - Tarot Challenge

Month Spread

Theme: Sea Tom – seek bliss. the things that make me happy or interest me. be open, affectionate and sincere
Departing energy: The Cat – you’ve been searching for your path, smelling the roses along the way. my path has been laid, I just need to follow it and listen to my heart to let it guide me.
Incoming energy: The Emperor – hold onto my power and set firm boundaries. I need to trust myself and my decisions
Advice: Earth Queen – I take pride in caring for others but I need to remember to attend to my own well being.

Where is my energy today?

Reversed Six of Fire
Acting with integrity and giving respect to maintain respect.
I have a tendency to be the sounding board at work. Even if I cannot fix a problem immediately, I make sure the other person feels heard.
Eventually, once their emotions have calmed, they almost always come around and realize that certain things really are out of my reach. But they always recognize that I stopped what I was doing to have a genuine conversation with them.
Sometimes that is all someone needs – someone to hear them and not brush them away. Especially in an academic setting – parents will go above and beyond to advocate for their children. While I’m not a parent, I can understand wanting to make sure those you love are cared for and supported.

What messages are being hidden?

Reversed Five of Earth
This month has been HARD – I’ve felt completely unmotivated and lethargic. I started this month so excited to start this new journey and my plans have completely fallen to the wayside.
My negativity regarding my situation is holding me back. Obsessing over things is counter productive and only hurts me further as time goes on. I need to take action to change my circumstances.

What energy/ies should I be expanding on?

XIV Grace
I should be focusing on my ability to adapt my energy as I need to remain balanced. Both my work and personal life have felt quite turbulent, while not entirely negative, I’ve been forced to face various situations I would have rather avoided. It has been difficult to walk and face those moments with the appropriate response when I have felt so emotional and out of control.

What challenges do I need to overcome?

Reversed I Cat Magic
As noted in my previous post I’ve felt pretty out of control this month. I’m rarely a “things happen to me” kind of person. However, this month I have wallowed in this unmotivated lethargy. I need to focus on the thing in my life that I can control – myself.
My attitude and actions shape the perception those around have of me. They notice my growing negativity and sass – particularly when it is unwarranted.
I need to take a step back and reassess my action/reaction to things.

Where can I be more flexible?

Seven of Sea
My path is not set it stone for this project and blog. I have big dreams for what I hope it becomes, but those dreams take action to achieve. My own interests evolve and influence my practice and path frequently. Adaptation is key in order to experience growth. I need to let my path guide me to my next steps – not force it to be.

Full Moon

What to release?

Reversed Ace of Fire.
I’ve been feeling a little lost wondering “what is next”, I’ve been so used to controlling the direction of my life that now that I’ve accomplished those goals I’m sitting here faced with a million possibilities. I need to let go of my need for control and just enjoy being.

What to Keep

Reversed Sky King
I need to reconnect and let myself feel and express my emotions. I need to remain connected with my emotions and let them guide my growth.

Lesson From last cycle

Reversed Two of Sky
Patience. Let my energy flow and my intuition guide me in decisions. I need to trust myself and my choices.


Ten of Sea
Seek out the support my closest friends and family can provide. I am not an island. I need their experience and wisdom to learn and expand my experience and perception.

How can I become better grounded?

Reversed Fire Tom
If you know me, I’m often the “yes lady”. In work, at home, I always jump even if I don’t always see the full scope of a situation. If my readings for this month have a theme for me to learn, it’s patience. I need to slow down just enough for my brain and heart to catch up. I’m always so excited to experience a new adventure or opportunity that I don’t give myself a chance to prepare for it.

How can I expand my self-awareness?

XIV Grace (again*) I need to seek out the things that keep me steady, that bring me peace. I need to learn to be still for just a moment and breath before moving on. Remaining calm and poised will benefit my mind and spirit as I face new challenges.

What conflicts need to be laid to rest?

Reversed Sea Kitten
Family always brings up a flood of emotions for me. Anytime it comes up I revert back to a petulant sixteen year old girl that thinks if she ignores it long enough, it will resolve itself. Moving past these moments has always been one of my biggest hurdles.

Draw a card/d from a deck you rarely use

Reversed Queen of Swords from the Everyday Witch.
This deck got straight to the point, haha. It wasn’t going to waste the chance to tell me I’ve been behaving like a brat lately. Moody, emotional, it’s felt like a tough month. I obviously need to get over it and face what’s bothering me.

Mercury Retrograde

What will be affected

Reversed Earth King.
Those that depend on me need to learn to stand on their own. Establish boundaries to help them forge their own path.

What lessons can I learn

Reversed Sea Queen. I need to learn to find my own happiness and healthy outlets. I cannot expect my loved ones to be and fulfill every need I may have.

What projects/themes should I revisit?

Reversed Tower. Patience! Again! Haha. As if my previous draws weren’t enough of a hint. I need to slow down and focus on the task in front of me. One step at a time. Things will happen when they happen.

Best way to handle this retrograde

Reversed Seven of Sea. Follow through on my actions and projects. Focusing on the task at hand (^^^) will keep me from feeling overwhelmed and lost.

What energy/ies do I need to replenish?

Five of Earth
I need to focus on myself and trust that this slump I am in will pass. I’ve always been about self love and self care and my rituals have kind of fallen away. I need to refocus my energy on bringing myself up and loving where I am right now, I’ll move past it in time.

What energy/ies do I need to be more receptive of?

Eight of Fire
I need to recognize the moments where my energy kicks up. What really gets me moving and motivated? What makes me want to tackle everything in my path and take on the world? What am I passionate about?

Where do I need to stop procrastinating?

Seven of Earth.
I won’t lie – this one stumped me. The ultimate card of patience and relaxation. Things will come to be when they are ready. I shouldn’t try to force them into fruition. I guess I’ll take it as a sign that refocusing on caring for myself will allow the universe to get things going without my being in the way.

In what way can I be successful today?

Reversed Ace of Earth
I have some work to do… While I may be getting yelled at this month to be patient and calm, that doesn’t mean I can just sit on the sidelines. Work I do now will bring good things but the work must be done. Magick means effort.

Where can I be more responsible?

Reversed Cat Magic
I really need to refocus on the things I can control – my attitude, my actions, pretty much just ME. My bratty attitude has been a nuisance and it’s time to give a good kick in the pants and grow the hell up. Reclaiming your power is about owning all of you and while I can write about it, actions are what count.

Where can I show more gratitude?

Reversed Earth King
Appreciate my own abilities and the work we’ve done to establish our home as a safe and successful space. My husband and I work incredibly hard to move towards the lifestyle we want. He is my rock and he needs to know that I always look to him for support.

How can I be more authentic?

Ace of Earth
Be generous, patient, seek out the opportunities that bring me joy. Positivity in any situation is often my default. Things will get better or change.

Cleansing & Clearing:

How do you clear the unwanted energy from your decks?
I have a sacred space that my cards call home. It’s a cozy space that I frequently cleanse with this amazing Sacred Space spray I purchased from a local witch. It’s so calming and completely refocuses the energy in the space. I also give my cards kisses before doing big draws or if I feel I need to recenter with them.

New Moon:

What is my divine guidance (Inner Star Oracle – Magic)

Embrace the Change; Essential Growth; Unfolding Lesson

Lesson on What?

Earth Tom (jumper) -Laying the foundation for my endeavors through steady work and patience (ha, patience again). Developing skills and knowledge necessary to succeed
01 Cat – Happiness with where I am now and openness to new opportunities that are on their way
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram for every day content.
Join the Magickal Mavens facebook group!  It’s full of amazingly supportive practitioners that get it. Each week, I provide a live stream tarot forecast (and sometimes free short readings) and you’ll get access to special discount codes, promo teasers and future giveaways!
Hit “Subscribe” to be sure to get notifications of posts, updates, and other exciting announcements to come!
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Intentions & Magick

When you’re new to this journey, it’s easy to get swept along trying to do all the witchy and magickal things you read and hear you’re “supposed” to do.
We jump in feet first and follow the moon cycles and perform rituals and develop this deep connection to the world and nature around you and do all the spells to manifest all the things, etc., etc., etc., to feel as if we are a part of this community.
I totally burned out. I didn’t understand what the heck I was supposed to be focusing on to manifest the changes I wanted in my life.
Pinterest - Intentions & Magick
But it sounds so simple, right? Just pick a thing, focus on it and it should become what you envisioned.  If it was that easy to manifest change in ourselves and our lives, we would not be having this conversation. No one would. The injustices of the world would be fixed, no one would want for anything, and life as we know it will have achieved utopia.
If you have no idea how to navigate the hard stuff that drives intentions – your emotions – you are just going through the motions.  You are not engaging the true power of your emotional energy to push things into action.
Your energetic vibration is deeply tied to your emotional and mental state.  You can feel someone’s emotions radiate off of them if they feel something strong enough.  We’ve all had that moment where we can look at a person and just based on the air around them, we know exactly how they’re feeling.
That is the energy we want to put to work.
Magick aligns your energetic vibration with the vibration of your intention. By aligning those pieces, a clearer path for your energy to manifest your goal is created. I like to think of energy as a river. Without guidance or direction, it forges its own path through all sorts of obstacles. But energy, like water, is lazy.  It will always take the easiest route.
So how do we deal with the emotional baggage we carry when we’re taught to shy away from anything remotely negative. We bottle them up and roll them under the rug. We’re told that positive attitudes are everything.  If you aren’t being positive, you aren’t trying hard enough. How could you possibly manifest positive things into your life?
Positivity in the face of difficult situations is different than truly feeling positive. 
We face crappy situations every day, feel awful on the inside and still have a smile on our face and voice the hope that things turn out okay.
What you show to the world is rarely in alignment with what you truly feel. We are the masters of compartmentalization.
Those things that are hard to accept about yourself –that is where your intentions should be focused. Focus on your growth at your pace. You can’t work on all of you and change all of the things at once.  It’s a process. Your needs are going to evolve as you do and you will never be in the same place as your fellow witches. Forcing it is superficial and will get you a half-assed result that you’ll be dissatisfied with.
As Ron Swanson would say, “Never half-ass two things. Whole ass one thing.”
So – one emotional thing at a time, maven.
Here’s how I have been working on myself:
◊ Meditation

You had to have known I would say this, right? Even 5 minutes (and I can barely make it through 5 minutes) will give your brain a moment to just chill and actually work things out. Here are some of my favorite guided meditations to get started.

◊ Journaling of any kind.

Brain dump, art, whatever helps you get your emotions out of you so you don’t bottle them away. Once they’re out, they’re out and you’ll have to face them.

◊ Self care as ritual.

I love warm showers – I use them all the time to cleanse away the energy from the day and I feel lighter. It helps me focus and recharge. I am an introvert so I NEED to be able to find ways to recharge. Recognition of actions or interactions that change your energetic state is important. It will assist with developing your intuition.

◊ Tarot or divination tools

I know divination tools don’t jive with some people but if you’re open to trying out some more insightful questions you may be surprised by what they have to say. Try a tarot challenge that is ready to go.  I struggle with finding the right questions to ask myself.

◊ Natal or Birth Charts

This was so eye opening for me. I’m an Aquarius Sun, but I have never felt like anything to do with an Aquarius was me. Reading my full chart helped me understand why I react to certain things in a particular way and why I often feel in conflict with myself or with others. Here is where I got mine for free.

◊ Read. Read. Read.

Everything and Anything. Expand your worldview. Read up on things that you’ve always initially brushed away as “not your problem” or not your culture or history. Opening your mind to accepting all sorts of information and allowing yourself to develop an informed opinion on those matters will create this beautiful layering effect. Witches always say to take everything with a grain of salt – reading  will help you sort out what you resonate with or what serves no purpose in your craft.

If you have other ideas on how to get started on spiritual growth please share them!
I have seen some notes floating around that certain practices such as mindfulness or deep meditation can be dangerous for certain mental health issues. I always want our community to feel safe – so please chime in if you have experience with certain practices not working in those situations.
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram for every day content.
Join the Magickal Mavens facebook group!  It’s full of amazingly supportive practitioners that get it. Each week, I provide a live stream tarot forecast (and sometimes free short readings) and you’ll get access to special discount codes, promo teasers and future giveaways!
Hit “Subscribe” to be sure to get notifications of posts, updates, and other exciting announcements to come!
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Discovering My Pagan Path

As I mentioned in my About Me , my journey began in the gym about a year ago.
All my reasons for never going to the gym were gone when I graduated and when I came across an ad for a boot camp program, I felt something inside me shift. I took a leap and this wave of calm overtook me.  I was right where I was supposed to be – I was finally giving my body what it needed. I was taking care of myself and pushing that anxiety-inducing boundary completely opened my mind.
Months later, one of my sisters mentioned  that she identified as “pagan”.  As she explained her view of the world, I felt it again.  Something inside made a hand-brake turn and slid into place.
Pinterest - Discovering my Pagan Path.png
Next thing I knew, I was up to my eyes in articles, history, anything I could get my hands on.
I fell headlong into a whirlwind.
The tarot bug bit me hard and fast (much to our bank account’s dismay).  The moon has become my guide.  My natal chart made my head spin.
I’ve since taken a step back and started to take each interest in stride.  Being overwhelmed by all the tools is so easy – but they quickly become useless if you don’t learn and grow from their use.
It took a serious period of self-evaluation to discover what it was I needed. I felt out of whack,  but I knew I was on the right track.  I had this sudden (and frankly, unexpected) need to go outside, to just be away from the city.  Which was odd, considering how much I had always disliked camping or anything remotely outdoorsy. Bugs and dirt were never on my list of “things to experience”.
I now seek it out regularly. I feel at ease on a trail. My mind goes blank when I force my body to overcome the physical obstacles. Any tension or anxiety I felt just melts away.
I love feeling the shift as the weather turns, or as you come over a mountain peak. You can feel nature’s energy always seeking balance – always searching for neutral. Even when it’s wild and chaotic, you know that the calm will come.  The quiet will settle into place and everything will just be.
My path has become that search for balance.  I have always struggled with processing my own thoughts and emotions.  Because obviously emotions are a bad thing and should not be felt. I finally let myself feel and decide if it is something worth holding onto or if I can let it go.
I’m always learning and growing though.  Change is inevitable.  But for now, I like where I am heading.
I’d love to know how you discovered your path or if you were raised in a pagan home! Stories always make me so happy and I think it shows such diversity in our community. Everyone’s soul sings to a slightly different tune but we all manage to find our way here.
Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram for every day content.
Join the Magickal Mavens facebook group!  It’s full of amazingly supportive practitioners that get it. Each week, I provide a live stream tarot forecast (and sometimes free short readings) and you’ll get access to special discount codes, promo teasers and future giveaways!
Hit “Subscribe” to be sure to get notifications of posts, updates, and other exciting announcements to come!
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